10 Reasons to Consider Mediation
More and more people are using divorce mediation these days. If you, or
someone you know, are getting divorced, mediation may be a good method
1. It Costs Less
In divorce mediation, you meet together with one divorce mediator. You
usually share the cost, which is commonly between $2000 and $5000 total.
If you were to retain separate attorneys to represent you in the
divorce, you would each typically pay a retainer of $2500 to $8000 just
to get started. A typical divorce in court costs $50,000.
2. You Have Control
In divorce mediation, you both control how quickly or slowly decisions
are made, when the divorce petition is filed, and what the terms of the
divorce will be. These are written into the Marital Settlement
Agreement. Each step is by agreement, in contrast to the adversarial
process in which attorneys set court dates and judges make decisions
with limited time and information.
3. Paperwork Done for You
Many people try to do their own divorce these days, but run into
difficulty trying to understand the laws and the confusing paperwork
involved. A mediator who is also an attorney can prepare and file all of
the paperwork for you.
4. Easier on the Children
The worst aspect of a divorce for children is the conflict between the
parents. Divorce is traumatic enough for children, but they do better
when you work together to make adult decisions and do not put them in
5. Easier on You
The way your marriage ends will significantly affect the way you
approach your future relationships. When you use a mediator to help
communicate and make important decisions, it can be easier to move
forward and accept the past, rather than turning hurt and anger into an
expensive court battle.
6. You Can Still Go to Court
When you use divorce mediation, you do not give up your right to go to
court. If you are not satisfied in mediation, you can stop at any time,
retain a separate attorney and have the judge decide the unresolved
issues. What has occurred in mediation is legally confidential and
cannot be repeated in court, so you can start fresh.
7. You Receive Legal Information
In divorce mediation with a mediator who is also an attorney, you will
both be provided with legal information to help you make decisions about
what is fair. While an attorney acting in the role of a mediator cannot
give either of you legal advice, he or she can share general knowledge
of how a court might address the issues in your case.
8. Emotions Can Be Managed
Often, you want to be heard and understood in the divorce process. In
discussions on your own, this may be difficult. Anger and resentment may
be unintentionally triggered. A trained mediator can help you address
feelings, without allowing such feelings to dominate your decision
making process. In court, emotions often drive the case, and the cost,
more than any legal issue.
9. It is Confidential
Discussions and tentative agreements are confidential in private divorce
mediation. Confidentiality makes it easier for you to make offers and
consider alternatives without having everything completely planned out.
You can arrive at new agreements neither of you had previously
considered. You don’t give up any legal rights by trying mediation, and
what is said in mediation may not be repeated in court.
10. It Builds on the Positive
In mediation, you are both encouraged to find common ground for making
agreements. The focus is on decisions about the future, not past
National Conflict Resolution Center
Please share with anyone contemplating a divorce or separation,
Thank You. - Christopher Pulitano - NEW BEGINNINGS DIVORCE MEDIATION - 631-921-2454